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Error of Assumed Similarity and Spectrum of Honesty.
It is very difficult to know something if it can not be measured. We owe so much on our ability to measure. Without measurement there would be no science and technology revolution. Without measurement our way of life would be so different - no shops or factories, we would be feudal.
The big question is "How do we measure people?".
Everyone has one person they know reasonably well and that is themselves. They make the mistake of using themselves as the yard stick against which to measure others. They only know other people with reference back to themselves. They assume other people are like themselves and will do and behave like they will.
The understanding of other people requires better yard sticks than ourselves. The Spectrum of Honesty is now put forward as a yardstick against which to measure the honesty of others. One asks "Where on that spectrum of honesty are they?"
The Spectrum of Honesty.
This is about how we transact with others.
At one end of this spectrum are those who want to be liked and to ingratiate themselves to others will give away more than they get. Their transactions will be not be balanced. They give to others as they act to try to please. This category of people we would call givers and givers attract takers. Those who become their friends do so for what is in it for themselves - for what they can get out of it. Givers become disillusioned with people because the only ones they know are those who permanently and continually take from them - bludge off them.
There is also the person who does things for and gives to others to receive emotional rewards in exchange and then become emotionally very demanding and even punishing when her expectations are not met.
There are those who run with a system based on balance and equity. They give only to others where they will receive equally in exchange. The Christian principles of love thy neighbor as thy self is enforced in that they give only when they will receive in exchange.
There are those who will crib a little for their advantage. They will up the value of their product and service in their presentation to make it seem more worthy, more valuable. They will promote themselves and what they have to gain an advantage in the perception of others so they get a better than fair price for their products and services.
There are those who can do what they can justify. It is OK to rob KMart because they have so much, it is just not fair.
There are those who will lie to gain an advantage. These people can steal with justification processes.
So far we have looked at people who have limits on what they can and will do. There are people who have no limits and will do what they can get away with. Here there are three groups, there are those who will try to minimize harm to their victims, they will try to reduce the level of vengeance their victims may have towards them. They act secretly and deceptively and practice deception.
There are those who do not care how much harm they do others.
There are those who get a high out of hurting others. The viscous psychopaths. This group in males can be identified by their larger than usual knuckles earned from punching up others in pub fights and other places.
The measuring process:
If they will do it to others they will do it to you also. Listen to what they say and think why they are saying it. Listen to how they talk about others as this will be how they talk about you. Try to determine where they are on the spectrum of honesty. A few provocative questions like "What did you do wrong that caused ...." can provoke very telling responses.